


brought home to breathe smoke in the arms of her mother

by shorelinehunter



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, Gen, Sozin's Comet, read the warnings please and thank you, what is dialogue idk her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-30
Updated: 2019-10-30
Packaged: 2021-01-15 00:49:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21244772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shorelinehunter/pseuds/shorelinehunter
Summary: Zuko asks where her lightning has gone and all Azula can see is red.





	brought home to breathe smoke in the arms of her mother

**Author's Note:**

> i watched sozin's comet at the weekend and overall i very much enjoyed it but like the majority of people i didn't understand how azula could bend any kind of lightning considering she was the opposite of stable at this point so that's what this fic is about
> 
> content warnings for blood, halluncations, self-harm etc. but if there's anything else pls let me know

Zuko asks where her lightning has gone and all Azula can see is red. 

She howls, animalistic and raw. Digs her nails into palms, scratches at her face, her neck, where her skin is trying to crack and collapse and come apart. Everything’s conspiring against her. She can’t rely on anything not even her own body. 

Her power does not come from Sozin’s Comet. She’d still able to make tower tall flames and be in absolute control and set Zuko alight nevermind if there was a falling rock in the sky or not. Azula tries it again, because she will be victorious. Zuko will lose his life and Azula will laugh and laugh until tears fill her eyes, matching with bubbling lava kind of joy flowing out her mouth. 

Zuko doesn’t want her to be happy. Zuko does not care because instead of standing there and letting Azula’s flames swallow him whole like a good brother would, he splits them apart with his own fire. He stands there in front of her, seemingly without a drop of skin on him, breathing slowly, sparks around him moving in tandem. 

Azula wipes the sweat off her brow. Her palms are wet. Wet, red, dripping. It tastes like salt and iron. Azula wants to taste more. 

This should have been the start of everything. Her desires, her needs, everything that was destined to be hers, they were all meant to be fulfilled today on her coronation. This is all she wanted, to rule over a nation, to have them kneel before her and respect her. She used to think she’d need servants and aides, but Azula was wrong. So wrong because you can’t trust anyone, no one can be trusted because anyone could have a knife hidden in their sleeve, under their clothes, ready to carve her open. 

Her destiny is to rule alone beside the only person she can trust and she'll do anything for them. Her coronation is not ruined. Today will still be perfect. Once she is finished with Zuko, she’ll turn the waterbender to smoke and ash, and she’ll take her place on the throne, her throne, and she’ll put the Fire Lord headpiece n her hair, glance in the shards of the mirror to make sure it’s in a straight and proper before forcing it down until it breaks skin, until it hits bone. 

Her rule over the Fire Nation will begin under a blazing sky. Azula is burning up, and she’s never felt more alive. 

It will not be stopped by Zuko. Pathetic, worthless, useless, weak, inferior. Not by her worthless brother who was always lagging behind her, could never beat her despite being older, a boy, the first in line. Father cut in front of Iroh. Azula would do the same. She would do whatever was necessary to ensure that happened. 

Zuko is staring at her, set ready in a fighting stance. He never used to do that. He’d only look at her from the corner of his eye, gaze constantly skirting over like she was going to attack him while his back was turned, and Azula couldn’t disappoint him. If that’s what Zuko thought, that’s what he was going to get, and Zuko deserved anything he got because he never loved her. Never, they were bound by blood on their hands and nothing else. 

Zuko deserves to be treated the same way as Mother. They always deserved each other. The same kind of fate. 

For Zuko to ask for lightning, it’s enough to make Azula laugh, this screeching heaving sound. All he can do is redirect it, leech off Azula’s power like he's spent his entire life doing. The closest Zuko will ever get to creating lightning is to stand and wait for the spirits to strike him. 

There’s no spirits here now. Only Azula, only a demon set to rule. She’ll do well. Better than well. She’ll grant him his final wish and show him lightning. 

Fire burns. Fire consumes, forever spreading, never ending, an endless hunger that will not stop until the world’s lungs are filled with nothing but ash. Fire burns in uneven patterns, and is easily movable by the winds and creates messy, ugly scars on anything it touches. 

Lightning is beautiful. It exists for a moment, a flash of light, a crack of might, before splitting open whatever it touches. 

When Azula thinks of a beautiful sight, she thinks of the bloody wound on the Avatar’s back, how the red contrasted with the blue of his tattoo, the white lifeless colour of his skin. The shape reminded Azula of a star, one wished she could touch, that she could rip out and hang up on her ceiling so she could watch it while she fell asleep. 

Lightning swirls around Azula, sparking out beyond her reach and leaving jagged scorch marks on the ground, trying to escape which it should know better than to do that. Not one ignores Azula. She’s the one in control. She’s always the one in control. 

Zuko’s mouth moves. His eyes focusing and stance shifting, body readying for the impact. Azula takes in a deep breath, the gorgeous smell of something foreign, unnatural, and catches sight of the waterbender behind him. Azula’s face fractures, jaw splitting into a smile as she readies her aim, arm steady and ready to be pointed at the girl. She can’t wait to see the wound, to catch a glimpse inside her fragile body. Another star she’ll be able to add to her wall one day.

Mother is here. 

Mother is watching her. 

Mother has been doing so the whole time. She’s standing there, arms hidden in her sleeves. She’s behind Zuko, behind the waterbender, far away enough that Azula can’t make out her face. Mother reaches out with her hand and her mouth opens to say something that Azula does not hear. Can not make out over her own broken screams. She yells, cries out, the lightning surging and slipping from her control, sparking out to try and reach anything that can ground it. Her throat aches, her fingertips are burning, trembling like a pathetic leaf in the wind, and she feels weak, legs weak. Azula will not be let down again, not at all.

Azula forces her arms to stay up and aims the lightning right at Mother. Zuko and the waterbender are standing in the way. They’ll fall too, they’ll all fall. There will only be one person left standing. Sitting on the throne alone. 

Mother does not blink. Does not move. Does not pull back her hand. She moves her lips, there’s a shout and Azula releases the lightning. There’s a moment of quiet, where everything goes still and silent, weather and elements frozen for a second like a painted picture. A long enough second for Azula to close her eyes and think, finally, finally, she’ll have all she wants at last. She'll live in the dreams she never had. 

**Author's Note:**

> title is from state hospital by frightened rabbit, you could have taken any lyric/metaphor from that song and even the album its from and it would have worked imo 
> 
> thank you for reading <3


End file.
